Dear Grandpa...

Dear Grandpa...

I love you very much. I am sorry that I haven't been by to see you recently, even though you are doing much better. I know that when things were worse you did not want me there. It was too hard for you to see us hurting and for you to be in that helpless condition before our eyes. Even though you couldn't talk and had tubes coming out of ever where possible and you were not quite awake, I knew. You and I, we could always read each others minds.

The last time I was with you, Mom was gently stroking your head and singing you hymns. I tried to join in, but between my mom, my tears and off-key voice, we were horrible. I imagined you laughing at us and our poor attempt at calming you.

I am sorry that I can not control my tears when I am with you. I have had you for so long, it is hard to imagine life without you. I know this is natural and I know I have been spoiled to have 25 years with you, but it does not make this any more easier. I find my self unable to even think about you and what you are going through, let alone talk about it.

Grandma breaks my heart with the things she says to me. She says she finds peace in the hope that the Lord has given us. She knows that our time here on earth is short and the time she may have to be separated from you is even shorter. She admitted that her secret prayer for a long time has been that the Lord will take her first, so that she will not have to live without you. I hope to achieve that kind of love that is deep and rooted. It is unbreakable, unshakable and is bursting from within in you both.

Thank you for the memories. Thank you for taking time out of your life for me. Thank you for lunch at Taco Bell. Thank you for your never ending support and encouragement in all my crazy ventures. Thank you being so generous and not thinking twice about giving or providing for your LARGE and NEEDY family. You are our rock and support. We always knew you gave so much to us, but now we truly feel it from within.

I love you Grandpa...I am thankful for the time God has given us here on earth.